Burger King’s Angry Whopper is a burger with bacon, jalapenos and something called Angry Onions, topped with something called Angry Sauce. It’s got the best name of the three new items on the BK menu now appearing “for a limited time” to celebrate the Whopper’s 55th Anniversary. Traditionalists prefer the emerald as the proper gift for a 55th anniversary, but maybe the Home of the Whopper will start a new trend?
Mike: The Angry Whopper is much tastier than the Mangy Whopper.
Peter: I prefer the Passive-Aggressive Whopper. It’s like, “It’s fine. No. I told you, it’s fine.”
Eva: Or the It’s Not You, It’s Me Whopper.
Robert: These Whoppers really need to see the Whopper Therapist.
Leah: Wait, do Angry Whoppers come from Mad Cows?
Ian: The Angry Whopper leads to the Hate Whopper. The Hate Whopper leads to the Suffering Whopper. (Because the third Whopper is always the Suffering Whopper.)
Peter: Come over to the Dark Sandwich, Luke.
Ian: It’s all like, “Don’t make me angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.” Then I’m like, “No, you’re still pretty delicious.”
Eva: If it’s the Hulk now, before it must have been a slider.
Robert: This seems good, but bacon will pretty much cover up the taste of anything.
Peter: I love that bacon is the food equivalent of lighting a candle in the bathroom.
[The verdict: if you like a Whopper and you like rage, you’ll like this sandwich. Pretty tasty, tangy, with an angry amount of mayonnaise.]
Sandwich Monday is a regular feature from the staff of “Wait, Wait…Don’t Tell Me…” Sandwich Monday has no nutritional or educational value whatsoever, may cause heartburn, and it’s possible that reading it will make your eyes fat.