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I would caution you that unschooling is not unparenting. Unschooling parents are actively involved in their kids educations--finding resources, strewing their paths with interesting activities and materials, listening to their children as they explore and talk about their interests, the list goes on and on. It is a common misconception that homeschooling parents need to teach their children everything the children need to know. In fact, the children are living in the real world and learning all the time from parents, siblings, friends (of all ages), mentors, teachers, coaches, books, videos, media, etc.

I have been struck over and over with the maturity and confidence of homeschooled (including unschooled) teens. How often they are living the life they want to live, volunteering, working, starting their own businesses, interacting with people from many walks of life and not just 400 other kids their age. I don't think it is such a terrible thing to bristle at having to jump through stupid hoops and take a stand and refuse to do it from time to time.

I know there are many wonderful, resourceful teens who go to school also, but going to school is no guarantee that you'll develop good interpersonal skills and flexibility in dealing with different personalities.

Also, it is hard to imagine that taking on the commitment to homeschool your kids is abdicating the role of the parent, regardless of educational philosophy you adhere to. I'm sure some unschooling parents do probably abdicate this role, as do some parents of children who attend school. But if anything, homeschooling/unschooling means you are taking a much more active role in your children's education than the typical parent. Just because you are not telling them what to learn at a particular time doesn't mean that you are not providing guidance, having discussions, giving input, helping them find resources, and providing appropriate limits and teaching necessary life skills.

posted 4 years, 9 months ago
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I am a homeschooler with unschooling leanings, though may not be considered an unschooler by purists since we do some traditional academic school work at my prompting, but the vast majority of our learning is based on my kids interests. My original interest in homeschooling arose because I noticed that despite my many years of schooling (I have a Ph.D.), I had a shocking lack of ownership over what I learned, even in graduate school! I expected my teachers and professors to tell me what I should learn, and I put in the effort needed to get the grade I was shooting for. I didn't want my kids to spend 20+ years learning (and forgetting) things because someone tells them that they should. The mountains of information I regurgitated for various tests were mostly gone within weeks (or days) of taking the tests. But things I learned because I was interested in them stuck with me. This is the foundation of unschooling.

Also, as I looked back on my early years of schooling, I noticed that the only things I really learned before high school were how to read and write (which took a couple of months), basic computation (which could also easily have been picked up through living in the world and needing it), and some algebra and geometry, which I enjoyed thoroughly. What happened in all those years of language arts and social studies and science? Was it really necessary for me to spend 6 hours a day, 5 days a week from age 5 to 13 to learn to read and get some basic math skills?

So with my own kids, I've found that when they don't have to spend their days doing projects that they are simply not interested in, the world opens wide with possibilities. My history-loving daughter can spend her days reading Greek Myths and historical fiction and watching video clips from the history channel and writing plays and playing geography games. My science-loving son can spend his days watching and learning how the physical world works, mixing substances together and seeing what happens, observing insects, and watching science videos. For fun, my daughter is reading a math book about fractions. For fun, my son is listening to a survey of ancient history written for kids on CD. And these things stick with them, because they are interested in them.

I mention the academic topics because they sound schooly and my kids happen to enjoy them. But I also know unschooled kids (including mine) who spend days and days doing little else but playing legos or soccer or computer games or bionicals or pretend. I guess what is different about unschoolers is that they find these activities to also be worthy endeavors. These things feed the soul and mind just as much as traditional academic topics. And, I have heard story after story among my homeschooling friends about how a child's obsession with some apparently useless (i.e., non-academic) activity blossoms into so much more. Kids "wasting" hours and hours playing games on the computer end up making a good living in a job they love developing computer games. Kids doing nothing but fencing, then winding up traveling to France for competitions, learning French, getting interested in French history, then European history. One thing leads to another. When you are free to pursue the things you love, you find that more and more of the world becomes interesting.

I will say that I've heard some unschooled teens say that they felt they had to do a fair amount of catch-up when they got to college. For this reason I've kept some basic academics going in my house, which makes me not a pure unschooler, but I bet some would say that a little catch-up when you first get to college is a small price to pay for the resourcefulness, confidence, and life skills these kids acquired as unschoolers. And they may be right. I don't believe unschooling is the only way to achieve this qualities, but I do believe it helps.

Highlights of an unschooling day in our life: Today my son (7) watched video clips of Wired Science and my daughter (11) read a novel that is a spoof on a Greek Myth while I went in to work for a bit in the morning. After I got home, my son made French Toast and we had a late breakfast. My daughter played the piano, then made a scale model of her room and all her furniture to help her figure out how she wanted to rearrange it. Meanwhile, my son asked me to read _The World in One Day_, which shows all sorts of things that happen in one day, like how many bathtubs worth of blood your heart pumps in a day, and how much the fastest-growing plant grows in a day. Then we rearranged my daughter's room, went to swimming lessons, ate dinner, watched a documentary about the Beatles, and read aloud from a novel set in 1187 Jerusalem, _Pagan's Crusade_ (a very irreverent take on the Crusades, so far).

Longwinded! Sorry!

posted 4 years, 9 months ago
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