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Our grandson was concieved when our son was 18 to a girl he hardly knew and didn't want to marry. Our son didn't want anything to do with fatherhood and the childs mom left the child with us frequently from the time he was a baby 7 months old. Sometimes we would have him four days in a row because his mom would call and make an excuse as to why she needed us to keep him longer. We knew she was using us but choose to allow it for the sake of the little child.
We actually had him for about 50% of the time until he was almost 8 years old. I took him to most Doctors appointments, went to school conferences and he got off the bus at our house. Finally when he was 7 1/2 my husband and I became aware of what the situation was at his mother's house. She was using drugs and involved in unhealthy lifestyle. It was suggested to us by a neighbor of the child's mother that we take him from her. To make a long story short, we got permanent legal guardianship of him 2 months before his 8th birthday. He went to fifth grade at public school and then I homeschooled him for 2 1/2 years. He is twelve now and doing pretty well back in public school.
We didn't want to raise this little guy but knew that we were the only source of stability in his life. We adore him but of course we know that our lives would have been much different if we were not raising a child again. I am 54 and my husband is 61. We have gone through much adjustment and I won't say this has been or is easy but we wouldn't have it any other way. Our son is now involved in his son's life and that is helping to relieve some of the strain on us.
I think that raising another child is helping us to keep a youthful outlook and many people think that he is actually our child rather than our grandson.
From his view though, he feels that we are not a "normal" family and feels selfconcious about that. This child has not seen him birth mother for 19 months and we don't know exactly why. Much more can be said but suffice it to say that it is a difficult situation for both children and grandparents and yet these are our own flesh and blood and we feel that we are the best choice for raising them.

posted 4 years, 5 months ago
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