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What Would You Name Portland's Hypothetical MLB Team?


That’s what we asked Facebook listeners before we talked to the Portland Diamond Project this week. (Hear the interview above.)

We read a few of the several dozen responses we got on the show. But the post snowballed, and now more than 340 people have chimed in. So many names, so little time! We grouped some of the standouts into three categories, just for fun.

1. The Plausibles (These sound like they could be actual names to us, mostly. And some have history on their side.)

Fran Colgan: Rays

Hank Barnett: Athletics, if they move from Oakland

Bo Neill: Portland Steelheads

Robert Thornton: Beavers

MB Pusieski: Mavericks

Scott Harden: The Pilots. Actually, Scott wrote: “Portland has a rich baseball history with the names Beavers and Mavericks. Either would work. I am also fond of Pilots. I like alliteration and MLB stole a team called the Pilots from the Northwest when the Seattle Pilots were moved to Milwaukee and became the Brewers. There is even a Boeing Plant in Gresham that does the company’s most advanced metal working. All signs point to PILOTS!”

A close-up of Tampa Bay Rays center fielder Mallex Smith's uniform. The Rays are one team rumored for possible relocation.

A close-up of Tampa Bay Rays center fielder Mallex Smith’s uniform. The Rays are one team rumored for possible relocation.

Patrick Semansky/AP

2. The Platypuses (Funny Oddities)

Greg Liascos: The Portland Wet Sox (possibly the most frequently mentioned single suggestion)

Joseph Puckett: The Portland Reign (with a raindrop wearing a crown as the mascot)

Chris Bryant: The Portland Sustainabulls

Charles Freeborn: The Man Buns

Catt Mann Duu: The Mud Dawgs

3. The Discontents (aka For the love of Pete, don’t do this, no MLB in PDX. Ever. Please!)

Michael Terzian: The Portland Parasites

Mary Saunders: The Boondoggles

Christy Updegrave: The ‘ No One Cares About Baseball Why Can’t We Have A Football Team’ … ers …

Patty Rueter: Money Pit

Randall Worman: The Stumptown Stumblers

Finally, A Public Service Announcement for all the folks who suggested the Thorns:

We have a professional sports team named the Thorns! It’s the professional women’s soccer team!

Full disclosure related to the aforementioned PSA: Our executive producer, Sage Van Wing, just told me that the Reign is the name of the the Seattle women’s soccer team. I did not know that. Sigh.

To read all the suggestions or to add yours to the list (hey, it’d be fun to see how long the list could get!) click the original Facebook post.

Contact "Think Out Loud"

If you’d like to comment on any of the topics in this show, or suggest a topic of your own, please get in touch with us on Facebook or Twitter, send an email to thinkoutloud@opb.org, or you can leave a voicemail for us at 503-293-1983. The call-in phone number during the noon hour is 888-665-5865.

 
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